I flew home for a weekend reunion, and Saturday was my birthday.
We were at the park, and I wanted to swing with my little cousins. I hopped on, and as I was swinging, I thought, "this is WAY more fun than I ever remembered!" I was just swinging back and forth, back and forth, reliving my childhood, carefree days of summer....back and forth, back and forth, higher and higher...
Then suddenly...omg, I'm gonna HURL! Quick, how do you stop this thing?! Put my feet down? Oh, slam! That's NOT the way to stop! (Now I'm swinging side to side, the chains are getting twisted, and I'm desperately trying to slow down.) Trying not to laugh at myself, I remembered that we used to JUMP out of the swings. I'm gonna puke, so here goes...
I jumped. I fell on my face. My world was spinning. I was nauseous. The earth continued to feel like the great ocean blue, wave upon wave of sickening "splendor" for the next two hours. I decided that day that I had indeed "turned old."
happy freakin' birthday to me. I am definitely too old for this crap.
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ah, there you are, I guess it just took a little while longer, cause your old now.
ReplyDelete'unpacking'? Is that what you kids are callingn it these days?
ReplyDeleteyea... i was wondering where you were. i thought it was malad and then i worried that you had indeed fallen off the end of the earth. but, no... just a swing. getting old does blow. sorry!
ReplyDeleteHey nytro, do you mind were trying to have a conversation here.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, Jeff, what's wrong with that?
I think you already know from experience, I can keep this up all night.
ReplyDelete"with me" does that mean you've been gettin it without me?
ReplyDeleteSo your a cyber-slut and that's my fault? Why do they always blame the victim?
ReplyDeleteOh, that's just really sad. If your resorting to begging on the net, guess I better go pay you some love.
ReplyDeleteOkay, you win. Little Miss, you can have your blog back. I'm going to bed.
ReplyDeleteGee...I am SO glad that I can be a means of communication (translate: "foreplay") for the both of you! Ever tried marriage counseling? I heard it works wonders.
ReplyDeleteAnd nytro...it's true, once you're in Malad, you NEVER get out. I'm thinking about buying a summer home up there. No, seriously.
That's sad. Just sad! Most people who think about buying summer homes don't have Malad on the top of their lists! It's not the vacation destination that I think you think it is!
ReplyDeletehee, hee. Think of it. A decent home for $50,000. No need to lock your doors. The local doctor lives down the street (a real Northern Exposure retreat). Kids can ride their bikes, be out all day, and not have a single thing to worry about. Horses. Grandma. No crime (except lighting roman candles in the neighbor's mailbox or tipping cows). Close enough to visit Logan or SLC for an afternoon, yet far enough to "get away from the crazies", and it's ONLY for the summers. Plus, my dad's family lives there. I miss my cousins.
ReplyDeleteI know Malad is a black hole. (Obviously, it's sucking me in!) But Lava would only be an hour away!! ; )
You must be living in a big city somewhere if you're talking about wanting to get away from everything and live in Malad. I grew up in Preston (that's right, Napolean's town) and while I enjoyed my childhood, there is NO WAY I could live there as an adult... and Preston is bigger than Malad!
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ReplyDeleteSorry I deleted that, I wrote you name. And I remembered we weren't doing that
ReplyDeleteIt's true Malad is sucking you in, but if you buy a summer home there then I get to see you more, so I'll take what I can get. Plus I know you really wants to get to know your cousins and family, you have alot of catching up to do.
And Belle and Jeff I'm glad that this site has helped you guys communicate better, it's a good thing you guys type fast, if I didn't that with my husband, we'd either fight because he was too slow or he was spelling things wrong.
I did think she had gotten pretty popular. Awe we all missed your blogs while you were gone!
I find it hard to believe that anyone else has been to Malad. I've been conducting some archaeological research there for the last 2 years. I need to go back and finish it, but I'm think I age several months each time I visit...
ReplyDeleteJust me, it's ok, every one knows my name is Maaaaaannnndddddeeee!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd Chris, I'm curious, what type of archeological research are you doing in Malad? I could hook you up with a great home cooked meal!
; )
Little Miss, it's Maaaaan deeeee, get it straight!
ReplyDelete