Friday, September 29, 2006

T.G.I.F.

SERIOUSLY! IT'S FRIDAY!!

can you believe it??!!

______________________________

I Spoke Too Soon.

Anyone want to know how to get Cinderella to mop and scrub your kitchen floors on her hands and knees and do two loads of laundry? Do you?!

Here's the KEY:

Make sure your daughter eats expired yogurt followed by cheese cubes and a glass of milk. Wait less than two hours. Wait for it. Wait--

PROJECTILE VOMIT all over the kitchen floor! Five rounds of vomit, SPLATTERING everywhere, puking on the girl's shoes, the girl's clothes, my shoes, my clothes, the blanket, and the kitchen rug. Just when you think it's all over, the husband goes to run the bathwater. Two seconds later, the Tiny one stops what she is doing, looks at you with watering, red eyes--then WHAM! PROJECTILE VOMIT of red applesauce and crackers all over the kitchen floor, her clothes, my clothes, and of course, the blanket.

Here I am, holding two ragged little girls, covered in vomit--the husband takes them away while I begin to clean up. Not one minute later, I am dry heaving over the kitchen sink, trying to hold onto my dinner as though it was my last supper (Panera, mmmm...it was good!). Somehow I make it through, only to SLIP and FALL. Yep. Slip-n-Slide, vomit style. What a perfect ending to a Friday night.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to spray another round of Lysol. The stinch is unbearable!

9 comments:

  1. Can it just be SATURDAY afternoon. I wake up, my house is CLEAN and the Baby shower... is OVER! Can it??? Huh, Huh???

    ReplyDelete
  2. FRIDAY! YAY!

    Favorite day of the week!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Good work, very nice blog. Seems you enjoy working with/ on the internet. And
    if something like that even pays off well, it would be even better, woulnd't it?

    I chose you because you convinced meby all the effort you put into it. That
    really convinced me.
    For further information please look up my site www-franco.blogspot.com Please get more information
    on....see the video!

    ReplyDelete
  4. wow, franco, I'm flattered.

    we'll just leave it at that.
    Ok? Ok. thanks. buh-bye now.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hmmmm. GROSS!
    Reminds me of a time when we looked back at your tiney one right as she began to HURL all over the place in my car on the way to the Scrapbook store. Would you like to tell the REST of the story, like who sat in the hot, puke smelling car while you ran into the store??? Huh? TRUE FRIENDS... TRUE FRIENDS, and then you cleaned out the carseat until OH, 3:00 in the AM!

    So this week you've had the "SHAT'S and the HURLS" Please do NOT come and visit us! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Uh, My god. That's all that can be said.

    ReplyDelete
  7. They always wait until you have cleaned up one mess before they give you another! :]

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thank you for the small glimpse into my future. Add two puking cats into the mix and that's probably just about where I'll be in a few years.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ahh, this brings back memories of projectile vomited barbecue corn chips and pickle loaf sandwiches--it's been twelve years and my stomach still flips at the thought!

    ReplyDelete

Oh come on-- the least you can do is say HELLO!! You didn't come all this way to turn around and walk away, did you? DID YOU??