Taking Time for Myself

I set up a timeblog in addition to this one. I want to start keeping better track of our mornings. I usually can't account for the time between when the kids get up in the mornings and when they go back down for naps. It's hard to keep a schedule because my munchkins are all under the age of four. I figure this will be a good way to keep me focused each day. And though I can't budget my checkbook for the life of me, I'm going to attempt to budget my time (according to priority, of course) which will tend to shift from day to day, but here's to good intentions, right?

One problem. I had planned on using a standard chart to track my time and a column for each of the kids. Obviously, I can't do that on here. Any suggestions? I've made a link to my timeblog just so you can see what I'm talking about. (I realize it's a boring website; no need to state the obvious.)

btw, it has already been brought to my attention that adding another blog to curb my current blog addiction is indeed counterproductive. Again, no need to state the obvious.


Today's LaughWill Be Brought To You By: Petroville.

Apparently Monkeys Aren't The Only Ones Who Fling Poo

Yes, in fact, I hear one-year olds can do it too.

If I *heard* the story right, then I'd say when the mommy went in to get the baby from her crib this morning, there was an awful stinch. Upon approaching the monkey in her cage, the mommy noticed turds flung about in random fashion, smeared on her blankets and stuffed animals. And upon further examination saw the flat and bumpers covered with urine.

Once the animal was out of her entrapment, the mommy noticed no diaper...ANYWHERE. Now, if the monkey had a diaper on last night when she went to bed, and there was (obviously) NO SIGN of the said poo catcher in the morning, then where in the hell was it?!

eye witnesses say the monkey just brought the mommy an empty banana peel. (My guess is that it's with the diaper.) I blame Barefoot for this.

Dedicated to My Mom

This post is dedicated to my mom. She is living in Perth, Australia for the next two years serving a mission for our church. She has only been gone since May, but I miss her like crazy. I am really proud of her. She is an amazing woman, and I am so grateful to have been blessed with such a wonderful mother and friend.

I love you, Mom.

p.s. The clock is a little token to remind me (and the rest of blogworld) where you are, and how much you are loved. (Thanks Barefoot for setting that up for me, your HTML - ly challenged alter ego.)

HIJACKED

This Is What Happens at Little Miss's Imaginary House:



Cross dressers AND hooker flappers!





















AND underage vices galore! OH MY!













This is just to prove Little Miss IS my imaginary friend.

Barefoot Rules

Ok Damn Dog

1) Get OFF the Table! You are a DOG, not a cat, not a human...but a DOG! A canine!

2) Don't sit there on the couch chewing on something every time I turn my back and pretend that I don't know. Don't look at me with those houndpuppy eyes and think that I don't know that you're "secretly" chewing on nemo, or cookie monster, or a LittlePeople noah's ark animal!

I HEAR YOU.

It's Gettin' Hot in Herrr....

I have no idea what's going on today! Either it's too damn hot outside, and our A/C can't keep up, or it's just HOT IN HERRR...and we have to call Mr. Barefoot to come rescue us!

Serioulsy, I'm all but birthday-suitin' here (and trust me, that's NOT a pretty site). My kids are all taking their naps in a diaper or underwear only, and my dog just did THE MOST D-R-A-M-A-T-I-C "oh, I fell over from pure heat exhaustion, must have water and die" flop to the floor. She's now panting like a sick sealion in heat (no, I've never heard a sick horny sealion, but if I did, I bet I know how it would sound.)

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go sit in a bathtub full of ice to cool off, as my greatest fear of living in the South is slowly coming to pass...

NO A/C...OH THE INHUMANITY! THE PAIN!
are any of you feeling me here?! THIS IS TORTURE! IT'S HOT. I NEED A SHOWER. I NEED A SWIMMING POOL. I NEED A HAIRCUT. AND WHY DOES MY LIVINGROOM SMELL LIKE THAT?

the heat is really gettin' to me. send reinforcements. fast.

A Bad Sign.

You know it's a bad sign when your daughter rushes into your room in the morning and says, "mommy! don't get up yet. There's a big mess in the livingroom!"

(A FOUR year old's version of a mess, think about it, people!)

Help! There's a stow-away on My Site!

So I cannot figure this out!

I have a link to Daily Dancer on my blog. When I clicked on it this morning, it pulled up humanfauxpas.com I looked on my template, and the address is right, http://www.dailydancer.com/. And yet, when I click on it, a completely different site comes up! My blog has been hijacked! I just want Daily Dancer back!

any suggestions?

I Overheard Something About The Horse You Rode In On...

I Turned OLD on Saturday

I flew home for a weekend reunion, and Saturday was my birthday.

We were at the park, and I wanted to swing with my little cousins. I hopped on, and as I was swinging, I thought, "this is WAY more fun than I ever remembered!" I was just swinging back and forth, back and forth, reliving my childhood, carefree days of summer....back and forth, back and forth, higher and higher...

Then suddenly...omg, I'm gonna HURL! Quick, how do you stop this thing?! Put my feet down? Oh, slam! That's NOT the way to stop! (Now I'm swinging side to side, the chains are getting twisted, and I'm desperately trying to slow down.) Trying not to laugh at myself, I remembered that we used to JUMP out of the swings. I'm gonna puke, so here goes...

I jumped. I fell on my face. My world was spinning. I was nauseous. The earth continued to feel like the great ocean blue, wave upon wave of sickening "splendor" for the next two hours. I decided that day that I had indeed "turned old."

happy freakin' birthday to me. I am definitely too old for this crap.