Are You SURE We're Talking About The Same Kid?

We got Tiny's fall preschool evaluation home the other day, and N8 and I read it together-- guess when we started to laugh?...

Tiny is a very quiet, reserved little girl at school. She usually enjoys playing and spending time with the other children. Sometimes her feelings get hurt and she cries during play. We always work to straighten out these situations. She seems to enjoy our various circle time activities and she often participates in class discussions. Tiny always listens carefully, works hard and follows directions. She is a very well behaved, polite little girl. We do enjoy having her in our class. She is doing very well!

OH REEEEAAALLLLLYYYY?

I Am Normal. Shaddup. I Am Too!

Funny conversation today:

discussing toys with my friend,--(speak up if you wish)--
and somehow she brought up the fact that her Barbie dolls always ended up doing naughty things when they got together!

(light bulb moment)

MINE TOO!! Why is that?! Somehow Barbie was always naked and Ken was on top (fully clothed, go figure)--but that's probably the TRUE reason my husband won't allow Barbies in the house, not that they promote unhealthy body types with big boobs but the fact that they have SEX every chance they get!! Naughty, naughty toys.

*btw, apparently my friend and I are not alone in this-- Just googling for this picture brought up some horrible websites. (and NO--I did not include the words "naughty" or "sex"--I do have some smidgen of decency thank.you.very.much)

That's it- Barbie's out. She's an absolute whore and a disgraceful representative of women everywhere. I'm voting her off the Island.

Only This:

*within the walls of this house is the only place on earth that I am in control. I can worry sick over my children. I can fix the problems that go on within my own home. I can discuss solutions with my husband that will make our lives easier. But I cannot do more than that. If the walls of our house come caving in then I can be the one to jump in the middle of it and fight. If the walls begin to cave in for someone else, then all I can do is offer a prayer.

And that the ONLY thing I can do. I have to recognize that God is in control; otherwise our world would spiral out of control. (and that is just something I am not willing to be held accountable for)

If the shoe FITS...

This year I dressed up as a witch...how appropriate that the only purchase I had to make was the $1.99 hat from Target! (As my friends and family attest--I am a real WITCH lately)

I will wear my shoes proudly and fly away on my broomstick.

And trust me, you DON'T want to be caught in my way-

Still Lost in Thought...

Tonight our women's group got together for Girls Night Out. We were at the same restaurant for nearly 4 hours!! It was so nice (and somewhat amusing) to be with others who could relate to me at this point in my life, especially when that comfort and guidance came from all different walks of life.

Sometimes we get so caught up in our own lives (and the perceptions of how we view other's lives) that we miss out on so much. Every person on this earth has a story to tell. Every person we come in contact with has a history. Every person we pass on the street has a LIFE too.

We shared stories that made us laugh. We shared stories that made us cry. I feel so uplifted and yet at the same time--so incredibly humbled.

"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when [she] discovers that someone else believes in [her] and is willing to trust [her] with [her] friendship."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

So tell me... who's the horse's ass in your life?

or the politically correct: equine heinie?

Apparently I Come with a Warranty

(and NO, jess, that wasn't meant to sound dirty!)

It's true. After hearing a disturbing interview on NPR today regarding faulty pacemakers, my husband left me a message to have mine checked for a Medtronic RECALL.

Seriously? A recall on a piece of equipment that has been IMPLANTED in my HEART for the past 8 years?!--as though I can just simply exchange it for a new one?!

I downloaded the interview from NPR this morning, (which still wasn't totally clear on WHO is in danger of imminent DEATH), but apparently the leads from a particular model have begun to fray--causing them to break off inside the heart. And it took some digging to find the info on Medtronic's site.

By this point I had become somewhat sadistic-- laughing because there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it at the time--and seriously, what kind of bizarre shit happens only to me? isn't it just fitting then that of all people I should be the one to have a frayed lead break off inside my heart?!!

Then I began looking through all of my original paperwork and came across this lovely piece of information and simply DIED LAUGHING!!

After 5 years, I am Shit Out of Luck. Great.

Thanks NPR for giving me the heads up.

*btw, I am NOT one of those patient's with defective equipment. (even if I were, my cardiologist wouldn't remove it because of the risk of doing MORE DAMAGE to my heart--so either way, I'd have been totally screwed!)

**Not sure the point then...it's like the signs you pass going up the canyon roads "Watch out for Falling Rocks!" as if that's going to make all the difference and save a life!!!

You wonder how I feed my addiction?! Apparently I sell drugs to myself.

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To:	littlemissblogspot@yahoo.com
Subject:	Store
From:	littlemissblogspot@yahoo.com

LMAO!

I think Will Ferrel is one sick puppy! But I'm so glad he spends his time making home videos to share with the rest of us on the world wide web!

THE LANDLORD
(CLICK HERE!)


P.S. Princess Reva and Barefoot Belle, you truly are the luckiest girls in the world because you have me in your life. I know, it's the truth.

An Ode To Princess Reva and Barefoot Erika

Do you know how lucky the little miss is? Well let US tell you!

Oh Reva, how do I love thee, let me count thy many great qualities:

Reva thou art ridiculously good looking, lovingly neurotic, always loud and entertaining, a little left-brain challenged, extroverted, confoozled, estrogenated, FAB-BUL-OUS, unflatulent (too bad), incredibly musical (in fact I hear she still gots it!), hilarious, magnanimous, friend whore, cuddle whore (not sure we needed that information, what am I talking about? of course we do!), Ikea whore, chaste and a sexysexybeast. What more could a girl want???

Maybe a little Erika to go along with it:

Erika thou art pushy and insightful, distant but entertaining, LSU loving, headquarter remolding fool (did I mention my new bath tub?). Thy toes are ALWAYS painted, and she loves her some Barenaked Ladies (who doesn't?), Thy new camera completes her in ways she never imagined possible. Thy gazelle like intensity and complete lack of focus always makes things entertaining, to say the least. In short, never a dull moment, weather you need one or not.

Oh fair ladies, how lucky indeed is the little miss.

*this post was written by DRY Ink administration, with help from Princess Reva and based upon an idea of Princess Reva's in order not to have to look at the previous post for another damn minute! Okay and maybe to entertain ourselves just a little.