My Favorite Flower...

Cali Lilies have been my favorite flower since I discovered white daisies were more of a trend in the late 90's than anything else (after all, who doesn't like daisies?) Anyway, when we were first dating, N8 brought me a bouquet of beautiful wild flowers and cali lilies in a long stem box. They were beautiful and later became the grand design for my wedding bouquet.

Today I was flipping through a major fashion magazine and came across an ad for "vaginal rejuvination", apparently it's a big deal and people travel from all over the country to get their umm...yep--their girly parts nipped, tucked, tightened, or lasered because it's simply that big of a deal.

WHY THE HELL ARE THESE TWO TOPICS CONNECTED?!
you tell me-- click here!

-ok, so if the link above doesn't work then click here
you'll just have to scroll down to the middle of the page--the image I'm after is copyright protected or I'd just post it myself!! grrr.

Meeting Her Again for the First Time

I fell in love with my best friend's baby before she was even born and bonded with her the instant I laid eyes on that precious girl because I loved her mother. I had no idea it could ever get any better than that moment. I was wrong.

My niece came to visit for Thanksgiving. The last time I saw her she wasn't even a year old. She celebrated her 2nd birthday a couple months ago...and I never knew just how much I loved her until yesterday. Seeing this little girl for the first time all over again made my heart melt. She has the eyes of my brother, his nose, his facial expressions--and yet the delicate features of her mother. She is MY niece, MY family.

When my big brother (my very first friend, my mentor, my father figure, my confidant, my childhood hero) introduced me to his little girl--I wanted to wrap her up in a cute little bow and keep her forever because she was so much a part of me...I just never knew it until this weekend. Now I understand.

I saw her for the first time all over again, and I fell in love with her more than I ever thought possible.

I Understand.

When you have a child that has some type of delay, whether it's speech related or some other general developmental delay, any bit of progress appears as a monumental milestone.

Just last week I got to see Bud-duh open his carton of milk from the cafeteria all by himself and I wanted every parent in that room to acknowledge this accomplishment and be just as proud of him as I was at that very moment.

So when I read Dooce's post "Got Her Back Against the Record Machine", I completely understood. I get it. My child has just reached the stars.

And I LOVE this little boy!

Are You SURE We're Talking About The Same Kid?

We got Tiny's fall preschool evaluation home the other day, and N8 and I read it together-- guess when we started to laugh?...

Tiny is a very quiet, reserved little girl at school. She usually enjoys playing and spending time with the other children. Sometimes her feelings get hurt and she cries during play. We always work to straighten out these situations. She seems to enjoy our various circle time activities and she often participates in class discussions. Tiny always listens carefully, works hard and follows directions. She is a very well behaved, polite little girl. We do enjoy having her in our class. She is doing very well!

OH REEEEAAALLLLLYYYY?

I Am Normal. Shaddup. I Am Too!

Funny conversation today:

discussing toys with my friend,--(speak up if you wish)--
and somehow she brought up the fact that her Barbie dolls always ended up doing naughty things when they got together!

(light bulb moment)

MINE TOO!! Why is that?! Somehow Barbie was always naked and Ken was on top (fully clothed, go figure)--but that's probably the TRUE reason my husband won't allow Barbies in the house, not that they promote unhealthy body types with big boobs but the fact that they have SEX every chance they get!! Naughty, naughty toys.

*btw, apparently my friend and I are not alone in this-- Just googling for this picture brought up some horrible websites. (and NO--I did not include the words "naughty" or "sex"--I do have some smidgen of decency thank.you.very.much)

That's it- Barbie's out. She's an absolute whore and a disgraceful representative of women everywhere. I'm voting her off the Island.

Only This:

*within the walls of this house is the only place on earth that I am in control. I can worry sick over my children. I can fix the problems that go on within my own home. I can discuss solutions with my husband that will make our lives easier. But I cannot do more than that. If the walls of our house come caving in then I can be the one to jump in the middle of it and fight. If the walls begin to cave in for someone else, then all I can do is offer a prayer.

And that the ONLY thing I can do. I have to recognize that God is in control; otherwise our world would spiral out of control. (and that is just something I am not willing to be held accountable for)

If the shoe FITS...

This year I dressed up as a witch...how appropriate that the only purchase I had to make was the $1.99 hat from Target! (As my friends and family attest--I am a real WITCH lately)

I will wear my shoes proudly and fly away on my broomstick.

And trust me, you DON'T want to be caught in my way-

Still Lost in Thought...

Tonight our women's group got together for Girls Night Out. We were at the same restaurant for nearly 4 hours!! It was so nice (and somewhat amusing) to be with others who could relate to me at this point in my life, especially when that comfort and guidance came from all different walks of life.

Sometimes we get so caught up in our own lives (and the perceptions of how we view other's lives) that we miss out on so much. Every person on this earth has a story to tell. Every person we come in contact with has a history. Every person we pass on the street has a LIFE too.

We shared stories that made us laugh. We shared stories that made us cry. I feel so uplifted and yet at the same time--so incredibly humbled.

"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when [she] discovers that someone else believes in [her] and is willing to trust [her] with [her] friendship."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

So tell me... who's the horse's ass in your life?

or the politically correct: equine heinie?

Apparently I Come with a Warranty

(and NO, jess, that wasn't meant to sound dirty!)

It's true. After hearing a disturbing interview on NPR today regarding faulty pacemakers, my husband left me a message to have mine checked for a Medtronic RECALL.

Seriously? A recall on a piece of equipment that has been IMPLANTED in my HEART for the past 8 years?!--as though I can just simply exchange it for a new one?!

I downloaded the interview from NPR this morning, (which still wasn't totally clear on WHO is in danger of imminent DEATH), but apparently the leads from a particular model have begun to fray--causing them to break off inside the heart. And it took some digging to find the info on Medtronic's site.

By this point I had become somewhat sadistic-- laughing because there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it at the time--and seriously, what kind of bizarre shit happens only to me? isn't it just fitting then that of all people I should be the one to have a frayed lead break off inside my heart?!!

Then I began looking through all of my original paperwork and came across this lovely piece of information and simply DIED LAUGHING!!

After 5 years, I am Shit Out of Luck. Great.

Thanks NPR for giving me the heads up.

*btw, I am NOT one of those patient's with defective equipment. (even if I were, my cardiologist wouldn't remove it because of the risk of doing MORE DAMAGE to my heart--so either way, I'd have been totally screwed!)

**Not sure the point then...it's like the signs you pass going up the canyon roads "Watch out for Falling Rocks!" as if that's going to make all the difference and save a life!!!