My Sound Board

I desperately feel the need to reconnect with my life. It's damn near impossible for me to fathom the idea that life is normal. It.Is.NOT. Nearly 300,000 refugees have flooded our towns, and amongst the desperation and surreal tranquility, social unrest is erupting everywhere. You keep thinking that things can't get any worse; that you believe in the hope and trust of the human experience and desperately want to believe that people are good natured with pure intent. You want to believe that we can all come together in a time of crisis. You want to save the world.

After 9-11, there was a feeling of patriotism and honor, even pride in our country for the way we came together and strengthened one another. What do you do, how do you feel when mother nature obliterates lives, homes, businesses, entire towns...? Can you feel pride in the volunteers giving of themselves and their sustenance? Absolutely. Can you feel pride in our government for taking charge and trying to make things right again? Absolutely. Can you feel pride in the fact that people are continuing to suffer, starve, and die while organizations "get their shit together" so they can start helping the situation? Absolutely not.

Things are wrong. I try not to watch the news very much or even listen to the radio because of the absolute heartache I hear. I can't close my eyes on my way to the grocery store and turn my head to the poverty and desperation surrounding me. Barefoot and I have been doing the only thing we can do right now; gathering food, clothing, toiletries, bedding, and anything else people can donate to take up to our church where members are beginning to pour in. They have nothing to go home to. They literally don't have a clue what is to become of their lives at the end of this.

My family is safe. I have a safe shelter overhead. We have food and water. And.I.Feel.Guilty. I look at the people who continue to go to work (nail salons, craft stores, the Ice Cream man , jewelry stores, book stores), and I feel sick. Why?Because it means that people are trying to maintain normalcy. This does not sit well with me. I couldn't take a client in and give them a pedicure or a fancy haircut while others are starving and dying of heat stroke less than 30 miles from where I am! I know it's irrational, but I feel like the world needs drop everything and rescue these people...and ... just, fix it.

I KNOW LIFE NEEDS TO GET BACK TO NORMAL. I know this in my head; my heart just can't grasp it. I am not blaming anyone. I just need to vent. This is the best therapy I can get right now, and I'm going to take full advatage. I apologize for the rambling, but these are the issues I'm trying to deal with. I need to share these thoughts to maintain my sanity.

Keep in mind I never said my thoughts were rational, and in fact, I know that they are even wrong. (no need to correct me) This is just my reality right now, and I'm trying to deal with it the best way I can.

Somber Moods

So this is my second attempt. (The power keeps going out and threatening my sanity.) Despite the downed powerlines, trees, and fences, we all fared rather well. (btw, Barefoot's hurricane party wasn't as fun as she made it sound...apparently she can't kick Katrina's ass.) It looks like someone scattered confetti of leaves, branches, shingles, and misc. debris across our streets and yards. Nothing that a rake and a few nails can't fix.

I wish we could say the same thing for New Orleans. I don't feel like myself. My heart just aches for those who are still trying to survive through the aftermath. It is absolutely devastating. Please continue to keep your thoughts and prayers with them. While the historical city (now 80% underwater) can be rebuilt or fixed, those lives lost cannot be replaced.

And while I do have some good stories and pictures to share, I am in mourning. And until my absorption with MSNBC, CNN, and Fox News subsides...my mood will continue to be somber and reserved. It was comforting to know you were all concerned about us, and as soon as I can form a coherent thought, I'll post again.

Can't Help Myself...

I feel the need to blog about this damn hurricane that is now beginning to show it's ugly face on the coast. Hopefully, we're far enough inland to avoid the "catastrophic damage" the news has been predicting. We are however under a tornado watch until Monday night. Are we safe from the hurricane? yes and no. Though our area has not been asked to evacuate, many homes are boarded up, grocery stores and gas stations are empty, the freeways are gridlocked, and the icecream truck just drove down my street! WTH? Ok, now THAT was surreal.

There is just something so somber about all of this. It's as though we're watching a really bad trainwreck in slow motion...a 36 hour trainwreck, and there's nothing you can do about it until the damage has been done and you can go in and repair it. We'll probably be without power and water for a day or two (quite possibly longer), but we have the things we need. (At least, I think we do. We've never been through a hurricane before.)

I'm fed up with the anticipation of it all.
Hell hath no fury like mother nature.

Katrina, bring it on...Bitch.

Leftovers

So, I got this idea from soapbox.SUPERSTAR (Saturdays Sundries) ...and decided it's a great way to share my *LEFTOVERS* with everyone.

*little snipits not worth an entire entry, but worth saving as a draft for the moment you think it might possibly become blogworthy...and after weeks of no such luck,stumble across the perfect way to have your cake and eat it too. Yum, cake. I love cake. *

Can You Tell Me?
I hate it when I put something important in a "safe place" so I won't lose it, only to find out that I can't remember where that safe place is.


Quote for the day...
Adam Carolla (sp?) said, "my body is so hairy that wiping my ass is like getting peanut butter out of shag carpet."


Why I Hate Pull-ups # 41
When you take off the pull-up (even if you tear the sides instead of pulling them down), you roll it up, set it aside, and continue to wipe and change the bum. Makes sense, right?

Ha! The Pull-up has no fasteners to keep it from UNROLLING! And when it does, you can bet there will be rollie pollie turds all over your hardwood floors. Then you must get a pooperscooper (tissue) to go behind the Pull-up (waste of money) that was supposed to go behind the butt (cute little thing anyway) resulting in too much work!! Potty training sucks.


Good To Know #58
It's always a good idea to make sure there is a valve secured tightly in the sippy cup BEFORE giving it to your baby.


Today's Laugh...
Brought to you by http://www.mylifemycard.com/mylifemycard.html?celebId=ellend&moduleId=dancemachine

The Sex Camel Talk

For those of you needing clarification on the sex camel discussion taking place around here, check out the post and comments by Kelli Belly.

On a related topic, I heard this chick on MTV's Date My Mom saying, "as long as the drapes match the carpet, I'm happy...that is, if there is carpet." wth?! I am so over MTV.

Sticking with the theme we've got going here...
my friend once told me (after she had been married for over a year) that she was SO depressed because it was the first night they had gone without sex since they got married!! I was floored. Seriously. 365+ days of sex? Am I the only one who feels this is a bit disturbing?

Totally Worth It

The $12 cover charge for a girl who doesn't drink. The smoke filled bar. The three drunk freshmen at the front fighting for front stage. The guy who asked me what I did for a living (followed by beer out the nose when I told him I was a SAHM). The country boy just there to enjoy the show. Barefoot in the background watching me and laughing her ass off (thanks for the support). The roadie jammin' up front. The beer spilled down my back. The guy who's hand I had to slap ("mom" role kicking in). The opening band #1. Totally rocked. The opening band #2. Totally entertaining.

And then... Kevin Martin. (former lead singer of Candlebox)

Thanks for the beautiful voice. Thanks for the eye candy.

It was all TOTALLY worth it.

(Listen here, or here or here, or maybe just here.)

My self esteem point system.

2 points for getting carded at the door.

1 point for getting a glance behind the girlfriend's back.

4 points for getting offered a drink.

1 point for drunk guy #1 saying to his buddy, "she's hot."

-1 point for being called a _____, for making him put the beer DOWN.

5 points for guy hitting on me and asking rather personal questions.

(bonus 2 points for him acting as my body guard the rest of the night.)

10 points for Kevin Martin looking right at me and saying,

"and you're gonna get more, baby."

6 points for him shaking my hand during his last song.

8 points for him signing my cd after the show.

10 points for that smile as I walk away.

If you want more details, you'll have to ask Barefoot (as I clearly only remember the whole night as one hazy dream!)

That's a total of 48 points to get me through tomorrow's diaper changes, wet beds, canine piss on the bedroom floor, piled up laundary, screaming toddlers, unshaved legs, realizing I am no longer 16 years old, and my never ending saga of the flat mormon butt syndrome.

When I reach 500, I'll have successfully become Keira Knightly. (she's hot)

A Sad Day

It was a sad day in the Little Miss household on this, the 21st day of August, 2005. It is the day that will forever be known as the day we buried those fallen victims of The Canine. The massacre was horrendous, and we just pray we can move on with our lives now that the victims have been properly laid to rest.

"I left my Cinderella on the livingroom floor, and Damn Dogg ate her. I am sad," said an eyewitness to the crime as she lovingly stroked Cinderella's hair for the last time.

As we picked up the carnage and vowed justice...our heads hung low. With a renewed committment to keeping the toys picked up, we look forward to moving past this awful event and hope for a better future.

In loving memory: cinderella (age 6 months), Nelly (age 2 months), Eeyore (age 10 years), Simba and King Mufasa (age 10 years), purple ball (age 2 years), Cookie Monster (age 10 years), bathtub frog (age 1 year), little people leopard (age 18 months), Noah's bird (age 18 months).

Growing Pains

I'm sorry to admit, but the time has finally come.

I had to have the "it's not ok to fart in front of your brother's speech therapists during a grown up planning meeting at the kitchen table" talk with my four year old.

...you should have seen the disappointment in her eyes.

Gee Thanks, Loriloo.

I've been tagged by The Manager ; ) to list 10 turn ons and 10 turn offs. But rule #1, you are not allowed to be turned on or off by my list, and if you are, please refrain from telling me about it. Rule #2, I am allowed to change this list often. Rule #3, though I have a natural talent for making anything sound dirty...this is not one of those times. And Rule #4, Just Me, Belle, Holli, and Wendi...You're next! (yes, even if you have done it before, you have just been tagged again!)

Things that turn me ON:

1) when my husband wears his tight black shirt, a little cologne, and has five o'clock shadow.
2) hearing my name said in a sweet, sentimental type way. I love my name, but I hate it when someone yells it...oops, that's a turn off, i'll save that part for later.
3) chocolate! anything chocolate!
4) a nice, hot bath with candles and no kids....(ahhhhh)
5) driving a Mitsubishi Eclipse convertible Spider through the canyon
6) music (the type depends on my mood)
7) honesty and true friends (you know who you are!)
8) flowers
9) shopping!! (I love a good spending spree at Target!)
10) clean sheets

BONUS: Keira Knightly...she's hot.


Things that turn me OFF:

1) spilled milk. I hate spilled milk. I hate spilled sour milk even worse.
2) sticky. I hate sticky.
3) spam. I HATE spammers! GET OFF MY SITE!
4) forwarded e-mails when they never bother to keep in touch otherwise.
5) people signing me up for "free offers", etc. because it benefits them.
6) anonymous comments
7) RUDE and judgemental people; hypocrites
8) fidgeting, people who fidget drive me crazy...they make ME restless!
9) B.O.--nothing nastier!
10) saying my name in a mean or disappointed way...makes me sad.

BONUS: when I get the living shit scared out of me. (sorry, i tried to write "bejeebers" but there are times when only "shit" will suffice.) I hate it when people jump out and yell "BOO!", especially if they reach out and grab me! Or if it's followed by a comment about reptiles! YOU MEAN PEOPLE SUCK.

Comments!

Do you ever leave comments on someone else's blog that just cracks you up inside? And you wish you could just copy and paste them onto your own blog so others could join in the fun?

It's like a really, REALLY good fart, and you're the only one around to hear it. Makes you want to look around and say, "did you just hear that?!!"

And in leiu of body humor, today's laugh will be brought to you by nytro. (unless of course, she tells me to delete the link! LOL)