bizarre

Where is Perez when you need him?! Hmmm? I expected SOMEONE to totally rip on Taylor Swift for her performance on the CMA's last night...I have been sorely disappointed. I guess winning Album of the Year had something to do with it, eh? This punk rock/teenage angst thing just wasn't workin for her...and actually, she reminded me of ME (long legs, lanky, not great with choreography but following someone else's dance steps anyway) and I just felt bad for her. Okay, I felt bad for myself. But whatever. Watch the video. You decide.



*word of caution, the song AND the bizarre outbreak (I mean break out) performance by Taylor kinda grows on you after a while

Apparently I Come with a Warranty

(and NO, jess, that wasn't meant to sound dirty!)

It's true. After hearing a disturbing interview on NPR today regarding faulty pacemakers, my husband left me a message to have mine checked for a Medtronic RECALL.

Seriously? A recall on a piece of equipment that has been IMPLANTED in my HEART for the past 8 years?!--as though I can just simply exchange it for a new one?!

I downloaded the interview from NPR this morning, (which still wasn't totally clear on WHO is in danger of imminent DEATH), but apparently the leads from a particular model have begun to fray--causing them to break off inside the heart. And it took some digging to find the info on Medtronic's site.

By this point I had become somewhat sadistic-- laughing because there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it at the time--and seriously, what kind of bizarre shit happens only to me? isn't it just fitting then that of all people I should be the one to have a frayed lead break off inside my heart?!!

Then I began looking through all of my original paperwork and came across this lovely piece of information and simply DIED LAUGHING!!

After 5 years, I am Shit Out of Luck. Great.

Thanks NPR for giving me the heads up.

*btw, I am NOT one of those patient's with defective equipment. (even if I were, my cardiologist wouldn't remove it because of the risk of doing MORE DAMAGE to my heart--so either way, I'd have been totally screwed!)

**Not sure the point then...it's like the signs you pass going up the canyon roads "Watch out for Falling Rocks!" as if that's going to make all the difference and save a life!!!

Embarrassed now?--how 'bout now?

When my husband calls from work, he generally puts me on speakerphone. I get that he is busy and trying to do several things at once, but I HATE being on speakerphone.

So for the 3rd time today, he calls. I answer. He has me on speakerphone. He says, "I forgot to tell you something earlier."

to which I promptly reply:
You want to HAVE SEX with me?!!

*needless to say, he picked up the phone immediately.

BEAUTIFUL and POETIC: (not my writing style but this will have to do)

I walked my damn dog outside in the frigid cold and wind today (shaddup Iowa, Ohio, and Utah--to me it was FREEZING, as in the kind of frigid cold where you begin to question the amount of heat available in this world and truly wonder if it will ever be enough).
Anyway, she has been on a potty strike as of late, probably due to the fact that I threaten to shove my foot up her ass every time she refuses to poop because it's "just not the right spot"
--but that's beside the point.

Today we were walking all over the neighborhood when I saw SNOW. -granted it was more like dust specks floating around in a poorly lit room but it was beautiful to me- There was snow flying around me--and I was speechless. (I haven't seen snow since the 2002 Winter Olympic Games, and even that wasn't much at the time.) I was in awe of what I was seeing.

I was even more shocked by my reaction to seeing the snow...I was all warm and fuzzy inside; I would have cried but my nose was already burning from the cold--I had to hold back the tears. I never knew I missed it so much.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO ME!

Monday, monday...la la la lala!